Before I Fell in Love…

Hey…

I am looking for my diary.

That’s arguably the worst thing that can happen to me today.

It’s not the typical diary. It’s more like a friend. Those kinds that you don’t talk to everyday but when you do talk, you empty yourself.

That book knows everything about me. Everything!!!

Since 12yrs ago, long before I fell for anyone or before I loved perfumes…

when I felt terribly lonely in that empty class on ss1 block, somewhere in Abuloma and I badly needed my mummy or some friend that could just hear me out.

Strangely,it was overwhelming . Full, presssed down and shaken together. I knew that I had to let it out . Somehow. Somewhere.

I got out this new notebook and …

And love began.

I found friendship in the only way I could sustain it…

A friend that was there for me and me alone, that had no problems except mine, one that would listen and help me sort out all that I felt without an ounce of judgment, one that I could tell everything I thought and felt unbridled…

How can it be missing?🥺

My daughter was supposed to read that book😔.

12 whole years has passed, and here I am, 12 years older and it’s like de ja vu- I am again in this empty room, in a block of flats surrounded by untamed grasses… desperately craving my mummy or some friend that could just hear me out.

I have been here before😔

And after having a well deserved rest from a whole week of happenings, I knew I would just wake up to write…

Dearest my book

You know, I have been holding on to write because I know when I eventually do, it would be a tsunami as my life in this Uyo has been some sort of action packed movie thriller.

It’s been fleetingly fast, suspenseful, hilarious, sometimes romantic, exhausting and the plot-twists has had even me at the edge of my seat.

If it were a movie, i wouldn’t see it because I don’t do suspense, for fear my heart gives out.

The things that have happened, the people I have met, the friends I have lost, the new ways of seeing things, the places I have been, the things I have felt, the way I have moved past things I thought would kill me, or how I now care about things that just 6months ago I wouldn’t even sweat about , the things I have made peace with ,the way I have changed, the girl I have become… Kai no oo

Who would have thought????!!

And that’s how I would have gone on and on to scribble and gist- relating every experience with so much detail that months or years later, when I wake up one night after a bad nightmare and I sit with a cup of ginger tea and read the things I wrote about these moments- I would be reliving it one word at a time.

My life has been beautiful. I want that documented. In words. In pictures. With voices.

I want to be 80 and still remember in very clear detail what 23 felt like.

So I will find my diary/journal/friend. I have to.

I will take more pictures. Of people. And places. And things.

Because I have lived long enough to know that change happens. We lose people. We lose moments. Smiles fade. Feelings change. Situations reverse. We move. Nothing,typically, lasts forever.

And if time( as in minutes and seconds) is the currency of our lives…(and we know it is), then I want to capture mine- keep them locked in somehow. In words. In pictures. With voices.

I am dedicating this piece to my 17year old self- that wanted more than anything to “enjoy her own company and be a professor of happiness”.

Contrary to what she thought, that goal was not far-fetched at all. In true facts, she was one perspective away from it.

I know she is proud of this new me🤩🥳.

Okay, maybe not proud. But she definitely likes this new version.

As an aside…

Moxiescents is re-opening shop in December.

I am thinking of having a grand re-opening sales.

The plan is to match-make at least 70 bottles of perfumes to their loved owners, to help people capture moments and trap them as memories, memories that these scents can awaken in a spritz.

It’s something I am really excited about even when I haven’t figured it out completely- so I know it’s going to be absolutely amazing for you.

Save up your coins…

It’s going to be the best time in the year to stock up perfumes for the next beautiful year😌

Sekani💕